In this new weekly column, we bring you the internet’s top whingers of the week. Find out what’s pissed off travellers here on FlymeFunky….

Dear Sir / Madame
You really have no right to call the service you run from Bali a business class service
From your lounge partner in Denpasar charging me to access the Internet, to your crappy seats with minimum recline AND NO FOOT REST, to the hair in my food. Your inflight entertainment with a screen smaller than my IPad, which froze midway through the movie which I had to listen to on 1.99$ earphones.
Just in case you think I’m anti virgin, I’m not havering flown around the world with virgin Atlantic upper class which I loved.
Jet star, star class is a way better trip and I won’t use your service again it’s not worth the money or points
Ps cutting one dried apricot into four pieces and putting it next to the cheese on a plate does not make a “cheese platter”

FlymeFunky Response: 

Oh honey… build yourself a bridge with that pent-up anger and rage – at least you would do something constructive. The only shitty thing about this complaint is the hair in the food – the rest is a load of hogwash that really says more about your over-zealous expectations than the airline getting you from A to B.

It’s never a nice feeling being let down because of a single apricot and an absent foot rest. But it’s even worse being a cabin service manager on a flight with a grumpy prick sitting in 1A who complains about everything. Perhaps a little pre-purchase research would’ve bought your expectations into the realm of reality? PS… Virgin Atlantic and Virgin Australia are two separate airlines, and short-haul and long-haul products are typically worlds apart in offering.

On our flight UA 194 from LAX to SFO on May 2, the FAs not only didn’t serve  refreshments but they ate those bananas and pop chips and claimed that those  were crew meal.

Before the [United/Continental] merge, I got pre departure beverage in F on every single CO’s  flight. Unlike pmUA, sometimes you got and sometimes you didn’t. On UA 194,  we had very different treatment. The FAs were very happy but not to serve.

Instead of serving pre-departure beverage, they were happily chatting with each other with a cup of coffee in hand at the galley. So everyone in F could  see they enjoyed their moment. We thought it would be different after we took off.

We were only served beverage during this flight although it should also  contain refreshments as I got them every time between LAX and SFO. My seatmate and I both saw the FAs eating the bananas and pop chips at the galley so we pressed the flight attendant call button.

One male  flight attendant came and we asked about the refreshment. He just said  it had never been catered on this kind of short flight. Then, he asked me  what kind of refreshment I was talking about. I said those were bananas,  pop chips, and mix nuts. My seatmate and I both pointed to the female  FA who was eating those in the galley. The male FA just simply said those  were crew meal (I had talked to several different FAs including pmCO’s and  pmUA’s that those were not crew meal and those should be the refreshments to serve to F passengers).

My seatmate and I were both amazed about the  attitude from those FAs.  Before landing, one of the FAs who was also the one who ate those  refreshments at the galley put those pop chips and mix nuts into to her  bag. Wow……we just couldn’t believe our eyes ………  I think UA should investigate about this. It’s totally unacceptable especially lying to its customers.

FlymeFunky Response: 

Before I go on, I just want you to know that I’m sitting here scoffing on chips and chocolate. You know why? Because I bought my own. Perhaps you should do the same next time your on a 1 hour flight?

Most people I know are aware that flying in the US can be like running a marathon on an empty stomach, even in First class. Putting that aside I’m struggling to understand how you’re seriously writing a complaint letter about this United Airlines version of the ‘Hunger Games’… were you starving yourself in preparation for this flight? Did you expect a silver service banquet on this 60min flight? I just all seems a little odd.

What I will agree with you on is that observing the crew scoffing their faces and squealing with delight might incite a level of rage among some passengers. According to the United Airlines dining page, you should be entitled to “cookies or pretzels served with the beverage of your choice”. The fact that these weren’t provided implies that the cabin crew were obviously hellbent on pissing-off the fat bag in 3C who was continually eyeballing them.